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Cosmo/Quotes
: booming "I DON'T WANT BURRITOS!!! THEY MAKE ME GASSYYY!!!!!" ---- : "Look at me! I'm cheese!" ---- :"Phillip!" ---- :"What's wrong with being naked in public?" ---- :Timmy: A world without girls! (farts) I'm free! Cosmo: (sniffs the air) Wow! Freedom stinks. ---- :"And the coat of topsoil makes it crunchy on the outside and chewy on the inside!" ---- :"'We can refer to anything, we three, we the people, and my favorite - wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" ---- :"Now it's 9:05 on the east coast!" ---- :[After Wanda says "pudding"] ''"She said 'pu' and then 'ding'!" ''hysterically ---- :[right after Vicky cries for help] "Sorry, the secret word was "pie"." [throws pie in Vicky's face] ---- :blowing up Fairy World"Uh, Binky did it! TO THE ESCAPE POD!!!" ---- :"Ah...good times, good times..." ---- :"And corn is niiiiice..." ---- :"A nickel! Mine!" ---- :"I hope he wishes for pudding!" ---- :"Aaah! That book is terrifying, there are words in it!" ---- :"Oh, Timmy, Timmy, Timmy! What about my needs!?" ---- :"I regret nothing!" ---- :"There's still enough pretty color left for one of us to slide down the magical rainbow bridge! Wow! There wasn't a single manly word in that sentence!" ---- : ---- :[to Wanda] "Do you mind?! Your disembodied head is nag nag nagging next to my severed ear!" ---- :"Ha! I'm licking the popcorn so I don't have to share it!" ---- :"I hated being a robot. I had no free will, I had to follow orders all the time, it was like being married all over again!! Except with more toast." ---- :"So much clogging!!!" ---- :"Either that or he wanted a banana." ---- :"Or my favorite: WHEE!" ---- :"I like monkeys!" (head flattens) ---- :"Whoo Whoo Baby! Whoo Whoo!" ---- :"Let's do the nag! You nag it to the left! You nag to the right! Come on everybody let's Nag tonight! I'm a livin' doll!" ---- :"Ducky!" ---- :"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! PUDDING!! HAHAHAHA ---- :"Wanda! You have some explain' to do! ---- :"Uh... Babbaloo?" ---- :"A hug would be nice!!" ---- :"I thought she loved Timmy. Why did she eat him?" ---- :"Ah, the great outdoors, and no wife! Ooh yeah, I'm gonna swing, daddy-o! I'm gonna call on my old friends! (leafing through book) Let's see, Wanda, Wanda with a little star next to it, Panda, no that's Wanda with a smudge on the 'W'. I... I... (crying) I miss Wanda!" ---- :"You always were great with dessert!" ---- :"Well, she's not perfect, but she is the one who said yes." ---- :"I slaved over a hot wand for this? ---- :"I'm not bright, big words confuse me, I have the attention span of a rodent, and Wanda loves me anyway! She makes me happy, and that should be enough for you!" ---- :Cosmo: If I could just light these candles, we could eat! :Wanda: Did it ever occur to you we're in a fishbowl filled with water? :Cosmo: That's why I'm trying to light these candles. Somebody's got to dry up all this wet food! ---- :Wanda: We don't want to be her godparents! She's mean! :Cosmo: Yeah, we like Timmy better! His hat is pink! ---- :"Yippie! That ouched!" ---- :"Snowball!" ---- :"A magic wand in the wrong hands could mean total disaster... and Vicky's hands are the worst hands around!" ---- :"It's time for me to use the most powerful magical weapon in my arsenal: Me!" ---- :"Must, resist, stupidity urge!" ---- :Wanda: I've made reservations at Chez Fairee, the best restaurant in Fairy World. :Cosmo: Ohhh, then I'd better learn how to use the soup spoon properly! (hits himself with it) Ow ow ow! ---- :Cosmo: We're dining in the bathroom? Then I'd better learn how to use toilet paper. (again hits himself with it) Ow ow ow! :Wanda: Well a nice quiet dinner with my man does sound kind of nice. :Cosmo: Man? What man? Does your man know how to use toilet paper like me? (hits himself in the face with the toilet paper again) Ow ow ow! ---- :Wanda: Cosmo, what are you doing in the vaccum cleaner?" :Cosmo: "Duh. Vaccuming." ---- :"We're two halves of a whole idiot!" ---- :"Wow, the Acursed One. I haven't heard that name in a while." ---- :"We're The Morons! Check it out, I even made matching outfits!" ---- :"Poof, daddy's home, and I brought some leftovers!" (hits self with it) ow ow ow! ---- :(Floating With You) :Cosmo: I saw her and no other. :I still lived with my mother :When I spotted her swirly pink hair :Though my shoes smell like tar pits :And I don't wash my armpits :I like monkeys too much, :But I know she doesn't care. :And I know that I'm forgetful. :I know I'm dim. :And even though I've just eaten. :I know I'll swim. :I know that it doesn't matter, :If I can't count to two. :As long as I'm floating With you. ---- :"No way, man! I'm swimming in a real toilet and I like it!" :Cosmo and Wanda: Yay toilets! ---- :"Super Toilet! So much clogging . . ." ---- :"You bet. I'm swimming in my own toilet, (farts) and I like it!" ---- :Cosmo: Psst. Timmy. :Timmy: What is it? :Wanda: We got good news and bad news. :Timmy: What's the good news? :Cosmo: The alien we got is actually a prince from the dreaded war planet Yugopotamia. :Wanda: And his parents are on their way to destroy the earth and rescue their son. :Timmy: What's the bad news? :Wanda: Oh wait, that was the bad news. :Timmy: Then what's the good news? :Cosmo: I found a nickel! ---- :Cosmo: The good news is I named my nickel Philip. :King Grippulon: What's the bad news? :Cosmo: It's a girl nickel. ---- :Wanda: (hosting a quiz show) What flammable-- :Cosmo: (presses buzzer) Pudding! ---- :"Ooo, look at his face, look at his face! He's got that I'm-going-to-make-a-really-freaky-wish look!" ---- :"Hey, Timmy's a good kisser! G-o-o-o-o, Timmy!" ---- :Wanda: Hey, Cosmo? :Cosmo: Yes, my love? :Wanda: Do you ever feel like your life is already planned out? Like, someone else is in control of your destiny? :Cosmo: I always thought YOU were in control of my destiny! ---- :"Hey, you're right, lollypop! I told you I'd love you until the end of time, and I still do!" ---- :"Meat!? Why did it have to be meat?" ---- :Timmy: Do you have to go Hawaii for your second honeymoon? :Wanda: Yes, sweetie. After all, it has been 9,895 years since Cosmo and I tied the knot. :Cosmo: Feels just like 4,489 years ago. ---- :"I may not have your muscles, hairstyle, good looks, or singing voice, but Wanda loves me anyway!" ---- :"Dear diary, I fear the hunt!" ---- :"Gah! Heights give me the queasies!" ---- :Cosmo: Isn't that how we met, Wanda? I was about to jump into a vat of sharp spikes and asparagus rather than admit I lied to you? :Wanda: No, but ain't love grand? ---- :"Save Vicky?! Timmy would never say that! What year is this and what kind of twisted future are we in?!!!" ---- :Cosmo: Hey, you are pretty good at this. :Wanda: It's for three-year-olds! ---- :"Are you gonna finish your wand?" ---- :Wanda: Um, Timmy, What are you doing before noon on a Saturday? :Cosmo: Ah! He most not be the real Timmy! Imposer! ---- :"Oooooo, I love scuba driving!" ---- :"Yay, rabies!" ---- :"Don't forget the rabies! Everything tastes better with rabies!" ---- :Wanda: It could be worse, sweetie! :Cosmo: Yeah! At least your parents aren't going away for the weekend and leaving your evil babysitter Vicky in charge! :Vicky: Surprise, twerp! Your parents are going away for the weekend and left me in charge! :Wanda: You gotta stop saying things like that! :Cosmo: It is my gift; it is my curse! ---- :"Can we skip to Juliet's funeral?" ---- :Timmy: This is a piece of cake. All I do is to find shapes, and I found them immediately! :Cosmo: And that is a piece of cake! Oh wait, it's just a barber. ---- :"Word!" ---- :"What?! What's the matter with you?! How could you say that?! I thought you loved me! What horrible future is this?!!!" ---- :"What is this brain you speak of?" ---- :"Well I'm a boob, and Wanda trapped me into marriage..." ---- :Wanda: There are four basic elements: earth, air, fire, and-- :Cosmo: JELLY BEANS! ---- :Wanda: Don't we always have the best times? :Cosmo: I can't tell time! ---- :"Good evening, everyone. We're your perfectly normal not-magic-fairy human waiters with unbelievably super-hairy legs and underarms!" ---- :"String!!" ---- :Wanda: Now Timmy, this is a lot more serious than one of your video games. We've lost our powers because of this Syndicate and we won't be able to do anything until they're stopped. :Cosmo: Yeah, Timmy! Right now, this wand is just a glorified backscratcher! ---- :(Whispering)"Timmy, go to the pier!!" ---- :"To the right! To the left! Everything you own in a box to the left! ---- :Wanda: Cosmo, we gotta stop her before she breaks up our family! :Cosmo: For once, I agree with your shrill, commanding and authoritative voice! glares at him I mean, I love you! ---- :"Timmy was not in the center of Earth but I'll keep searching!" ---- :Cosmo: Hey Timmy, let's do something really, really fun! :Wanda: Yeah! Super fun! :Cosmo: Like shave Crocker, turn your dad into a woman, turn Wanda into a woman... glares at him I mean, you're the wind beneath my wings! ---- :Timmy: What are you guys doing? And what have you done to yourselves? :Cosmo: We're waiters! 'Course, it's just a stepping stone on our path to becoming actors. STELLA!! ---- :"Oh no! She played the smoothie card - Timmy's one weakness! Mine is lint." ---- :"I hate change! That's why I only change my underwear every 3,000 years." ---- :Tootie: What is this place? :Cosmo: A prison of unspeakable horror! ---- :Cosmo: Don't forget to feed the dog! :Wanda: Cosmo, he doesn't have a dog! :Cosmo: Well, if you get one, don't forget to feeeeeeeed it! ---- :"He is soooo smooth." ---- :Wanda: Timmy! We've missed you! :Cosmo: Yeah, without you around, all we do is sit around and talk about our feelings... :Wanda: at him Hmm? :Cosmo: Not that there's anything wrong with that! Wanda I love you! ---- :Wanda: Isn't this great, Cosmo? After all these years, they finally ended up together! :Cosmo: I give 'em two weeks, tops! ---- :Tootie: Well, awesome! So that means we could bring water to the Sahara and close the hole in the o-zone layer and help helpless creatures? :Cosmo: Not only that, we've got cup holders, baby! :Tootie: Fancy! ---- :in Jorgen's grip And right now,he's doing the Von Strangling part! ---- :Timmy: "Aaaaaaaaaaaah!!!" :Cosmo: "Hey, it's okay. You had a good life, right?" :Timmy: "I'm only 10!" :Cosmo "I said good, not long." ---- :"Ladies and Gentlemen, Little Cosmo has left the building!" ---- :Wanda Timmy in Doidle's body "Timmy sure does sound excited; what is he saying?" :Cosmo "I don't know I don't speak dog." ---- :(To Timmy about wishing for Christmas to be everyday) "Wow that sure was one big wish you made there sport." ---- :"Curse you, round hole!" ---- :"Yes, and that's our job!" ---- :"Hey, Timmy! Say 'chimichanga!'" ---- :"And I, unfortunately, will not be going, because I'm extremely allergic to danger!" ---- :"Uh-oh, we gonna need a LOT of crossword puzzles!" ---- :Wanda: "He said 'Chocolate Shake,' not 'Chocolate Snake!' " :Cosmo: "I gonna get this thing fixed" ---- :Oh look, a new problem! Sparky has fleas! Right on, man! ---- :Ooh, dark in here. Ironic for a lamp ---- :"Done," Grant said, waffle-y. ---- :Magic, oh, magic, oh! ---- :I'll call dibs on Wanda's dogs then! ---- :I am Cosmo Khan! ---- :999,999! 1,000,000 1,000,000! Whew! ---- :Not the face, I'm a celebrity! (bears attack him) Not the salmon costume, it's rented! ---- :Dry, stupid paint, DRY! (kicks wall, which collapses on him) ---- :I can't wait to have intelligent conversations with him! Of course I have to get intelligent first. ---- :Gah! (Poofs up chalkboard) It's like fingernails on a chalkboard! (Throws board out the window, hitting Mr. Turner) ---- :"This lava's cooking us to medium-rare!" ---- :"He's a little hyper tonight. I probably shouldn't have let him polish off the leftover Halloween candy." ---- : "And that truant officer with a voice like a shallow grave. What was his name again, Deadlyditch? Three-Feet-Under?" ---- : "Shiny object, must follow!" Category:Quote pages Category:Characters Category:Quotes